The Spiritual Trace

Everything we do has some sort of trace associated with it. I recall one of the laws of physics being taught to me as a young man “Every action has an equal and opposite reaction”. It wasn’t obvious to me that this was always the case, but I believed my instructor and I needed to pass my physics exam. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. This is Newton’s Third Law.

In the world of physics, particularly the physics of motion, when one ball bearing hits another it moves the one it collides. We can relate to this, the same occurs when we bump into someone or two cars crash; there are many examples in the world.

Have you ever thought this law applies to the spiritual world? Many would argue the answer to this is yes. Often referred to as karma in the Hindu tradition, the actions of one person on another, either positive or negative, will create a response, maybe not immediately, but in time karma will be delivered. So therefore negative and positive actions will be paid in full. So what does this mean to us? And how does it relate to the title of this reflection, the spiritual trace?

I would argue, in any tradition, but particularly the Christian tradition, that everything we do has a spiritual component, and therefore has a spiritual consequence. We can see this amongst ourselves, by not forgiving someone with deliberation, we hang on, internally to the act of unforgiveness. The resolution has not been made. And therefore the disturbance remains. If you like a spiritual trace.

There are many examples in our lives where this occurs. Depending on our level of sensitivity these traces are heightened by the characteristics of our personality and spiritual disposition. For example, people who are in the highly sensitive category, such as those described in Elaine Aron’s book The Highly Sensitive Person, can feel this at a much higher level. And as her book points out there’s a much higher percentage of the population in this category than we might think.

Part of the problem is that we feel, some of us do at least, that we can separate what’s going on in our lives from our prayer life, or if not prayer life, the way that we conduct ourselves. So we cannot be a truly kind and gentle person to our family and our close friends, and behave like an awful person to everyone else. There has to be balance here. And if we don’t let go, do not resolve problems, don’t forgive, bear grudges, all of these things leave a trace. A spiritual trace.

There is another side to this coin, of course,  the good also leaves a spiritual trace. Many of these become reminders to us when we remember another person, a place, or a situation. A spiritual trace comes back to life. It might be an old birthday card, a picture taken years ago that reminds us of the good times as well.

Our lives are littered with remembrances; spiritual traces, both positive and negative. So the question remains: how do we deal with them? What are the spiritual traces niggling us, keeping us awake at night, giving us that funny feeling in our stomach when we meet this person, or returning to this subject, of that missed opportunity because we didn’t have the courage and love to deal with it earlier? Are we still leaving unresolved spiritual traces out there? They, like problems, tend to accumulate, so what starts as a small puddle, can become a reservoir of difficulty over time.

What are the wonderful spiritual traces in your life? That recent anniversary, the souvenir you found, or even a remembrance of a favorite movie you watched with a lover or friend.

Our lives are littered with these traces, let’s notice them and not forget they are reminders of a road to a more peace-filled existence, depending on how we deal with or cherish them, for they leave another trace with others. The trace is me.  

Photograph and Reflection Copyright 2024 Michael J. Cunningham OFS

In Times of Sadness 

We can feel great sadness at various times in our lives, in particular when something difficult presents itself. Illness, loss of a job, financial problems, separation from family and friends, and of course, the loss (or impending loss) of a loved one. 

Times like these often cause us to oscillate between anger and sadness, just as if we are grieving. In a way we are, our soul wants a response. We want to understand the why of our circumstances, looking around for someone to blame for it. If not others, then even ourselves. We begin to regret actions taken or not taken, and spend time looking backward or into the near future about what we can do to avoid what may be an inevitable outcome. 

More than anything, we should understand two things. One, we are never alone. God is always with us (Matthew 28:20), God is within us, always holding us. We can lean into God. He will hold us up. 

The second is our nature. We are eternal beings. There will be an end to our physical life, even the suffering we or others endure, but then we continue. It is hard to remember this when we have so much of our lives focused on our healthiness, prestige in the world, and our possessions. The only possession worth anything is our relationship with God and the others he placed us near. This is all steeped in love. Love is God’s channel of communication. We are assured of this. 

Connecting these two elements can give us great solace when we are feeling down, sorry for ourselves, or others. Remember, even Jesus had his Blessed Mother to remind him of His humanity at the most difficult time in his mission. We can lean on Him, and lean on those around us (who lean on Him.) 

The Sorrow of Mary (Mater Dolorosa, Passionist Retreat Center, Sierra Madre, CA) 

Lean In
A prayer for times of distress 

Lean in hard to God. 

He will provide the support when you are exhausted.

He will help you when you are helpless.

He will love you when you have spilled yours to all around you. 

Lean into His love.

Now. 

Lean In. 

Copyright 2024 Poem, image and reflection Michael J. Cunningham OFS

The Toy Shop 

The Toy Shop

I woke up one night this week, in the middle of the night, after apparently crying in my dreams. I must have been about 7 years old in the dream, leaning against the window of one of my favorite places to visit. Even though I rarely went inside. It was a toy shop from my hometown in Melksham, England. The reason I was crying is the merchandising layout in the window was just awful. (In my dream). None of the toys that I could see in the window were recognizable, they weren’t properly presented either and just hung randomly like clothes in a used apparel store. There were no marketing displays for the toys, and all the wonderful toys that I recall from my toddler and elementary school years were missing. I’m not sure if I was crying because they were missing, or the sad state of marketing in the store itself. Perhaps both. The toys looked abandoned.

I thought it used to be so beautiful in here. Toys for the younger kids were at the front of the store, but even at seven and eight years old I was lusting after the large, flyable, balsa wood airplanes, particularly the ones that had engines; the mechanical steam engines and all the fancy HO and OO miniature train sets. These were at the rear of the store, up a few steps from the entrance area.  It was a place of great beauty. I could have spent hours there. 

The toy shop had all the toys I could not have; and all the toys I could never afford. It reminded me, as I leaned up against the window as a little boy in my dream, of the longing that this store created in me. 

Now I know what you are thinking, here is this little boy just wanting more toys. Well, yes, that is true of course, but I also think that other factors were affecting my longing. My friends. I often found myself being excluded from certain games and activities that my friends along our street were involved with. They had the equivalent of Barbie (in the UK known as “Cindy”), Action Man, Tommy Gunn, and various toy train sets and their stations. You needed these toys to participate in many of my friend’s games, and often I would not do so because of the lack of these “tools”. 

We were an Irish immigant family of four and my father provided for us, but there wasn’t a lot of extra cash to go around for these types of toys. It taught me at a young age if I wanted some of these things, discretionary funds were required, and I needed to go and do some work. For this reason, I became a paper delivery boy at a very young age. 

However, I digress. The feeling in this dream of the Toy Store not being what it was in my childhood is important. I wanted it to be that perfect, almost unattainable place of hope. Where even I could not afford most of what was in there, a way could be found to obtain some of these toys. It would not be easy, I would need to work, I would need to save, and I would ultimately need to share these precious toys with my friends. All of which came to pass. 

There was something about the longing though, the longing to have something beautiful that I could not afford, but that I could strive for. Something that I told me I would have to do something by myself to be successful. Any of the toys that I eventually acquired were looked after with great care. 

The Toy Shop is still there. Marketing new toys to a new generation of children, fifty years on.  

Perhaps the desire for “toys” still motivates us all too much. The large home, the oversized car, more clothes than we need. And yet many have all they possess in a shopping cart in an underpass.

There is a certain sadness in having too much. In abundance held too close.

Gratitude

In recent years, we have talked of hope being something not intended by its meaning. Another word that often gets used in a “false” sense in the world today is gratitude. Actually, that has probably been true over the centuries; people are good at appearing gratuitous with their gratitude but are often just hiding their feelings. 

Gratitude is taught as important; giving thanks for the blessings, gifts and resources we receive from others. Sometimes this may be born out of politeness or an expectation of credit for doing so; in other cases, it may just be from the heart, as intended. 

This short poem/reflection below talks to the theological gift of gratitude. It is a gift from God, even though we may feel we are “grateful” for the grace which provides the gift in the first place. Our disposition towards gratitude tells the whole story. It is about us getting thanks for what we do, or in giving the gift? No, it’s about doing the right thing anyway; God will thank us through an enriched relationship. 

Gratitude 

Gratitude is the gravy which comes before the end of the meal.

Smothering all our blessings, 

Resealing them with the goodness that delivered them. 

Particularly when we are not expecting,

Or deserving of them. 

Gratitude is the ability to keep an open heart, 

To be thankful, but in a real way,

Not with just a smile or handshake,

But with thanks given from inside, from the soul.

No holdback, no agenda, just thanksgiving. 

Gratitude is not expecting thanks for your work or deeds,

For then our work is worthless in the eyes of God, 

Merely done for glory,

Or some other purpose. 

Gratitude is a rush of grace, delivered not expecting payment or reward. 

Only then we feel gratitude, 

Receive gratitude, 

And then, like a mirror,

Grace is reflected in the face of the giver,

Who loves you for what you have done, and what you are. 

So today, let us feel gratitude being here together,

As the Body of Christ, 

Celebrating His gift of gratitude, as we give to each other,

And those in need of a retreat, solace, or just a kind, listening ear. 

For it is in our outpouring we also receive. 

The gift of gratitude, now being coddled and held within us all. 

Let us leave this place grateful 

Grateful for the sun rising,

For the heat in our homes,

The fresh tea on the stove,

And the love of God which dwells within. 

Amen 

Abundance – Take Two

A Beginners Mind

Recently I heard a recording from a Fr. Richard Rohr presentation called the “Beginners Mind”. It reminded me of how a child reacts to the world. When we arrive in a room with small children, the child looks for the adult with a smile, the one who is open and friendly. The simple detective work of one hunting and searching for love. 

Children detect hostility, unfriendliness and those who are unauthentic in a way which is beyond words. Their agenda is simple, there is no agenda. No duality in their thinking, just looking for the one who is most friendly, open and willing to love. Come play with me is mostly present in their eyes.  

How much of this can we learn again in our own relationship with God. How many have fallen prey to following the tradition rather than the love. Our Catholic tradition without love is meaningless. Particularly if we start to “preach” tradition in a way that divides us from others, rather than unites us in the community of God; the Body of Christ. The Church universal. 

We sometimes need a reminder the word Catholic means universal. For us this is universal love, and there is nowhere we can feel and hear that word more soundly than in the love expressed by a child. A child cannot fend for themselves, they survive only with love. So do I. Without love I am nothing, just someone looking for a cave to dwell in with a warm fire and a loving friend. 

The loving friend we seek is the same one the child in the room opens their heart towards. The love expressed by the adult in the room filled with the grace of God. And one willing to communicate it freely, willingly with the smile which requires no repayment. Just gift. Pure gift. 

Let us return to the “Beginners Mind”, let us unlearn the prejudices and offer ourselves openly to listen to others, even offer love to those we dislike; without scowl or pretense. The child in us all brings us back to the Beginners Mind, a time when we did not judge but loved. 

And sat silently on the floor waiting for God to come and play with us. Forever. 

BE READY LIKE A CHILD 

Be ready like a child,

For learning is simple when we accept

For belief with a child’s mind

is like simple addition.

The result is pure and right. 

“you are children of the light and children of the day.”

Thessalonians